December is a truly sh*tty time of year for me. The loss of both my parents within a week of Christmas a few years apart has made it almost impossible to face the Season. Having said that, each year I have gamely approached December telling myself that ‘it’s going to be different’. Problem is, however, the losses live so deeply in my psyche that just when I think I’m in the Christmas groove, I hit the scratch in the record! (Now that shows you how old I am!).
Last year I declared (mainly to myself) that I wasn’t going through it another year. I was not going to work in December, just focus on taking care of myself and getting through. What is that saying about the ‘best laid plans’? So this year what do I find myself doing? You got it, working like a crazy lady!
Till last night when I found myself thinking “this is nuts!” (and variations on that theme!) I decided today with the complete agreement of Dr B (the other Burnout Queen) that all bets were off…and so were all deadlines!
I’m done. Well, until the New Year. I am going to rest, relax, and even embrace the Christmas Spirit with my niece and her family who are arriving from Canada to spend the Holidays. This surprise visit has us over the moon! It’s been quite a few years since we have felt the warmth of family.
There will be a few more things in the pipeline up to the end of the year. Thank goodness for being organised. But for the most part I’m backing away from the computer, away from the deadlines, away from all the worrying and researching. For the next couple of weeks it is going to be way more likely to find me baking! (Yeah, my soul is dancing!)
Then look out 2015! Have we got plans for you: they are still cooking but they are going to be great.
Love Dr T