Womens Health | The Burnout Queens

Am I Burnt Out?

February 15, 2019

AM I BURNT OUT?

I am struck by how many women these days easily say, “oh I’m just so burnt out”. Sadly, I believe it’s a statement most of us seem to relate to in this fast-paced world today. Many of our clients come to us feeling down, depleted, and utterly overwhelmed…and you guessed it, they all say, I think I might be burning out.

What is this thing called Burnout?

We often ask people, ‘do you really know what burnout is’. We hear a variety of common responses some accurate, some not. Bottom line, if the information is not correct women don’t seek help and things get worse. It’s the way Burnout takes hold.

When people hear you say you’re burned out, they usually reply that everyone is stressed. If you think you are suffering from burnout and hear this, you walk away feeling foolish and inept for making a fuss, even though you feel about to drop from exhaustion.

Others talk about ‘being burned out’ in a manner that sounds like a fad or trend or something ultra-light. They are the ones who seemingly act like the ‘every-ready bunny’ and keep going, hardly skipping a beat. It makes it hard to believe they feel like you do, because you are struggling to keep up with everything. So you lie awake wondering what’s wrong with me that I can’t cope.

This would be a good moment to give Burnout some serious thought. What is it really and what does it look and feel like. The best medicine is to arm yourself with proper knowledge so that you can make decisions in aid of your well-being.

The Burnout Queens have put together this Simple Symptom Checklist for Burnout to help you identify whether or not you are burning out. See if you recognise any of the emotional, physical and mental changes for yourself.

Get immediate access to this Checklist

CLICK HERE:

Don’t dismiss your feelings and emotions. If it’s just stress it can’t be that bad, right? And if it’s really bothering you that much you must be depressed, right? Perhaps not.

Burnout is not stress and it’s not depression, although you just might ‘feel’ depressed and stressed when you keep trying to juggle all your responsibilities and never feel you get enough reprieve to feel well. If you are burnt out you keep trying to ‘keep going’, but with depression you just want to hide under the duvet forever!

Let’s nip burnout in the bud. Start by downloading our Simple Symptom Checklist for Burnout. This is the best and simplest way to check if you are actually burning out.

If you love downloading, you will love our Learn From Us page. Feel free to save and read as many of our resources that you think will help on your road to living a burnout-free lifestyle.

To your health!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

International Women’s Day today…

March 5, 2018

Email skills up to snuff? Part 3

October 19, 2017

Here’s the third Email Mistake that makes all of us look unprofessional according to Inc.com. It’s easy to do when you are bombarded by inbox overload or are squeezed for time. However, this mistake can make the best of us steam with irritation (at least it does me)

Slow response or no response at all.

The Inc article makes it clear that you should acknowledge receiving an email from someone, even if you quickly answer ‘got it’. I am so happy that this is what our VA does each time I send work from the UK to the US. One word from her that it landed in her inbox allows me to just move on knowing the work will be handled. Bless her she’s a highly sensitive person as well, so she ‘gets’ the importance of replies.

However, (this is a big irritation to me and most HSP’s I know) if I send an email with substantial information, opinion or suggestions in it, if I send a client a personalised visualisation, if I email a colleague with a joint business idea…I want to hear that it was received!!!!!! (notice irritation growing.)

You can double my irritation (and confusion) if a colleague or client wants to book time with me, and I take quick action to reply and offer a time slot (time zones are a challenge when working globally) and then I wait for a no-or-slow response…! Nothing irks me more than being asked for something, delivering, and then waiting for confirmation! I am left thinking several things.

My email never arrived or is languishing somewhere in the Ethernet.
The request for my time wasn’t that important in the first place (but I am keeping a timeslot open which means it’s still on my mind).
The person is lazy or impolite because they aren’t checking their inbox…hello (either way I’m starting to steam)!
They feel they are too busy and oops, ‘sorry it went to the bottom of my to-do list’.

Regardless of the WHY of no-or-slow replies to emails, the article (and I totally agree) suggests we filter and prioritise our emails and always send a quick reply regardless of restraints…(got it, got this, will reply tomorrow, I’ll get back to you on this asap).

I always use these suggestions and I always appreciate when others do the same. Don’t you?

(hello…are you there)

(hello?)

Hmm, note to self, better check this article reached everybody!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Check out the other 2 Email Mistakes that Make Us Look Unprofessional.

Email skills up to snuff?

Email skills up to snuff? Part 2

Email skills up to snuff?

September 26, 2017

I love reading my Inc.com online alerts. This one just jumped out at me. “5 Email Mistakes That Make You Look Extremely Unprofessional”

As a highly sensitive entrepreneur I take great pride in how I write my emails. Do you? Well, according to this article you definitely should. As I read it I had reactions to it (as a highly sensitive entrepreneur of course and a psychologist as well) so here’s my opinion on a great article, starting with the first of Peter’s 5 points.

1 Unstructured Criticism: First I hate the word criticism it’s so unconstructive. I prefer feedback because people tend to listen when it’s called feedback. The article says don’t ‘blast negativity at someone through an email’. Yes, words can appear harsher in print without the tone or facial expressions of the messenger.

For us highly sensitive person biz types, we love ‘seeing and hearing’ face and tone movements and levels. It gives me much more scope for the meaning of the words and the overall sense of the message I am being given. This way I definitely know how the messenger feels. Ho-hum, I know this is not always possible so…

The Inc article suggests delivering your criticism in ‘the compliment sandwich’ way! This sounds nice, but when I taught communication 101 at university this type of sandwich while nicer didn’t always digest well, particularly when using words like “great job Sue, but….” I can guarantee that Sue didn’t dwell on the great job part of the message, but she probably ruminated over all the stuff that came after BUT.

(On a psychological note, the truth and reality of a message always comes after the BUT).

The Burnout Queens suggest using kinder words overall. There is no need to be negative. Instead, focus on the strength of the person’s skills and encourage them in your feedback to use their strengths to correct themselves and their work. “Sue I loved the energy and creativity at the beginning of your report. Is there some way you can end it on that same enthusiastic and creative note?” Sue may actually shine and be proud of the outcome.

Next post, I’ll give you the HSP scoop on one more Email Mistake in this article. In the meantime, why not try The Burnout Queens’ Strength Building Feedback Style for the next few days with your colleagues (wink: it works with the kids and yourself as well).

If you’ve been served the compliment sandwich, let us know and what it may you feel like.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

For the original Inc.com article click here

Too Exhausted for a Life Vision…think again!

March 24, 2017

The Burnout Queens know that most of our Highly Sensitive Women are tired, frazzled and pulled in every direction in their everyday lives. So to suggest one more thing for them to pack into their lives seems cruel. But…

A Life Vision is just what these doctors order for frazzled, fried and burned out women. We know that on any given day, plans can get interrupted, postponed and forgotten in all the details of ‘being and doing’ for everyone. THAT is precisely why having a Life Vision is so very important to cultivate at different stages of your life. When it all goes sideways, isn’t it better to be able to go back to the drawing board and know you have already drawn something to follow? When the chaos and busyness drop off, you can reconnect with yourself quickly and without much struggle.

Quickly and without struggle. Foreign words to busy women, but they can exist.

On our previous blog (Do You Have a Life Vision) we outlined two of our Ideas about Life Visioning to help you get started and not become overwhelmed. Today we’re offering another two for your consideration.

The Burnout Queens want you to stop struggling and actually think about what it is you want in your life. It’s easier to plan and achieve once the vision (the big picture) is clear. So try these:

Idea: Vision is different than purpose. However, the dreams you have for your life can reveal your purpose to you. Your life purpose is embedded in your life vision at the age of 12 or 20 or 50 or 80 or…

Idea: Dreams come from the realm of “what if” and having a vision or a dream requires truthfulness about who you are and what you want. Truthfulness in your vision does not have to lead to limitation. Vision is expansive, illusion is limiting. Vision lends itself to plans and goals, illusion is a dead end.

Come on Darling. Start dreaming and achieving a life you want to live for yourself. I bet you do it all the time for your family, your friends, your colleagues. It’s time for you to get the big picture for your life and step in!

(It may help to read our March 11th Feature Article: Seeking the Big Picture | Life Vision Means Living Burnout Free here:

Leave us a comment and share what your vision is. We’d love to hear.

With love, The Burnout Queens xx