Stuck, stuck, stuck…just think of the possibilities, possibilities galore!
Having said that, we admit, it’s a pretty awful feeling, feeling stuck, feeling like you are getting nowhere. In fact it terrifies the boldest amongst us! That’s because there is this idea, or ideal, that we must always be getting somewhere, anywhere, even if we don’t know where. As long as we believe we are moving, we’re ok, approved of, and accepted.
I was about to write that feeling stuck is real, but you know I would be lying. There is no such feeling or emotion as ‘stuck’. However, I will bet if you are ‘stuck’ you are feeling unsure, confused, uncomfortable, hesitant, and most definitely fearful. The result of all these feelings is, well yes being stuck, but becoming what is commonly experienced as anxious, defensive, resistant, panicked, and powerless to change it. These ‘stuck’ reactions all come from being afraid: afraid to take the next step, afraid of change, afraid of staying the same, afraid of becoming someone new, afraid of your dreams and your desires. So you tell yourself you don’t know what to do…you are stuck.
Well, my loves, knowing you are stuck, being stuck, can herald the biggest step you will ever take.
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Here’s what stuck is… one foot on one edge of what feels like a precipice, one foot on the other side, and being too afraid to shift your weight. If you move an inch you believe you are going to fall into the abyss, into the unknown. When you are in that dire head-space you can’t take in new possibilities and you can’t let go of old and tired ones. You are stuck. You feel like the natural rhythm of your life has stopped. You feel frozen in some part of your life, maybe in your whole life. But what if there is no abyss to take a header into? What if, that next precarious step you take, you know that dangerous one, is the one that sets you on a whole new path?
Feeling stuck means something is ending, or already ended, but we don’t want to admit it.
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Oh, we probably know it’s ended, we just pretend we don’t know. That way we can stay put, dig in, hold tight, stay the course, and moan. While this is all very noble and valiant it becomes increasingly difficult to ignore your Inner Queen shouting “It’s over ma’am, move on!” (You always must address a Queen as ma’am!)
So, have you ever considered that as something ends, at that same moment in time, something new is beginning? Fascinating! So instead of becoming stuck life opens to new options and discoveries. And a Burnout Queen never stops discovering.
Here’s a little visualisation to try on yourself (indulge me please).
Picture yourself (or go ahead be brave and physically do it) sitting cross-legged in the middle of the floor. You cannot move left or right, You can only twirl around on your bottom. A friend walks in the room and asks:
What are you doing? You reply…I’m stuck. Why? Are you hurt? Do I need to call an ambulance? No, you reply, I’m stuck. What do you mean, can’t you get up? I could, you reply, but I’m stuck.
Your friend starts looking puzzled or suspicious (like you’ve been smoking something funny)
I’m confused, your friend says. Me too, you reply, that’s why I’m stuck. Why don’t you come over here and sit on the sofa and I’ll make you a nice cup of tea? your friend offers lovingly. I would love that, you say, but I can’t, you see [altogether everybody] I’m stuck!
We could keep on going but you get the picture…you’re stuck. However, you are not super-glued to the floor!
What’s keeping you stuck is your mind, thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and fears.
Indeed being stuck is a point of opportunity. At the very point you feel immobilised you need to engage your imagination because being stuck means that for once there are no obvious goals or limits (self imposed or other imposed) to get in the way, not a boundary in sight! Hoorah! You are finally free to move on, and all because of this blessed state of being stuck!
So when you hear yourself declaring “I can’t – I’m stuck!” Time to shake your head, (then for sure secure your crown) take a deep breath and repeat after me out loud (no louder) …
I am stuck, I am strong, and I can! I am ready for adventure because I am a Burnout Queen!
Until Next Time…Grab Life by the Crown!