burnout

What is burnout; information and understanding of the experience of burning out

Are you receiving feedback or criticism

A recent Inc.com article caught my eye. “It Took Sheryl Sandberg Exactly 2 Sentences to Give the Best Career Advice You’ll Hear Today”.

Well that sounded pretty impressive, so when I opened it up it really was talking about her opinion on receiving feedback. Excellent I thought, because the women we work with are highly sensitive and often can spot so-called feedback for what it really is ‘criticism’.

Read this article and see why feedback (even on the negative spectrum) can be a positive force for opportunity and criticism…well can just be hurtful and unhelpful.  (The Article)

Well, have you finished?  What do you think?  Leave your comments below.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Ex-client dropped me a line

I love opening my inbox to pleasant surprises.

Periodically and unexpectantly I hear from past clients out of the blue.  It always starts with “I don’t know if you remember me, but I wanted to let you know” .  The truth is, I remember all of them!

 

In my work as a therapist and coach I often witness the planting of new seeds, new ideas, new dreams in women who want to cultivate a good life for themselves.  It’s a privilege and responsibility to help them design and create their lives.

Sometimes I am not present for the full blossoming of  such a new and inspiring spirit.  I wonder whatever happened to so-and-so.  Where did she end up.  I hope she is living happily.   And then I wake to this kind of email.  I smile and cry as I read this from a young 20 something who is now 40 something as she shares the blossoming and depth of her life.

I have always made one request of my women clients…never settle, be happy and inspire another woman’s life when you can.  

So get ready, really ready to be inspired!

“This message is for Bev. I wonder if you remember me? You have helped many people through the years, and I was one of them twenty years ago. My name is Deirdre M. I just wanted to tell you that your influence in my life has changed – and continues to inform – me in many ways. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Guess where I am right now? I am at the eating disorder clinic in Castlegar, BC, waiting to see a client. How I remember when I was sitting where she sits today. I received my masters in counselling this past year, and work for Interior Health in the Kootenays. I am raising a daughter who is almost 16. I have a wonderful life, and you had so much to do with that! My best friend is still Maria, whom you also counselled. She lives in New York, and we meet up at least twice a year and go travelling.

I’m sure you hear stories of gratitude often enough, but maybe one cannot hear that often enough. I am inspired by the life you two seem to be living – congratulations! I also want to get a PhD, but that will wait a few years.

Thanks again – I hope you are having a wonderful fall!

Much love,   Deirdre”

Thanks Deirdre for allowing me to share this and to inspire other women to move forward in their lives with a sense of not knowing, but becoming who they are meant to be!

Love, Dr B (The Burnout Queens)

 

Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected! (tip 10)

If you are ready to “Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected!”, you will certainly have to try this great little tip….

(excerpt from Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected! 60 fabulous tips to help you live with less pressure and more ease! by The Burnout Queens)

 

Tip No 10: 

Go ahead and giggle!  Laughter relieves tension, makes us breathe more deeply, releases ‘happy’  brain chemicals (legal ones), relaxes our muscles, and makes us feel more relaxed overall.   How perfect!

Highly Sensitive Women sometimes forget to laugh out loud so purposely look for things that make you laugh.

  • Plan lunch or coffee with that special friend who always has you in stitches.
  • Turn on the comedy station instead of the news.
  • Watch a classic comedy that makes you laugh even when you know what’s coming.

Good for the face, good for the heart and great for the soul!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Prepping for vacation: The Burnout Queens style

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Here we were rushing, working, preparing, writing, and recording our latest programme all before the lovely relations joined us for two weeks of hols in the hot english seaside.

We were working to a deadline but it was a mindset and an arbitrary date that, if kept, would see us exhausted and grumpy for the hols (I wish they weren’t coming so soon) instead of anticipating them with joy (can’t wait to see them again)!  So we decided it’s joy rather than exhaustion. 

How did we turn it around in our favour. You know the answer. We did it with Burnout Queen-style!

  • Listening to our own wisdom (walking the walk)
  • Being mindful of our bodies screaming ‘stop already’
  • Prioritising us over the work (front & centre)
  • Knowing when to say ‘no’ and let it go

That meant we stopped early and left the outstanding bits for our return. The old burnout personality would have thought ‘eeek not a wise decision, better get it finished because you may not be able to find that groove you were in’.   Well that groove was turning into a right old rut and we’ve learned that leaving it can be a far wiser choice.  We had written down where to begin again and what we wanted to say in an outline, so we were covered.  Done with the prep work, all we needed on  return were the sparkly touches.

We trusted how we were feeling and made decisions about our health before digging in and running ourselves into the ground.  We were not going to spoil this vacation. No way, no how. These Burnout Queens had palaces and castles to conquer and lots and lots of tea and cake to eat!

By golly that’s exactly what happened.  Palaces, teas and castles delighted all of us and on return to work, the new programme was sparkled up and launched!

Next time you have a deadline with something wonderful as it’s reward make sure you have the energy left to enjoy it fully.  Remember to prepare for your vacation in true Burnout-Queen-style.

The programme?  We’ve called it …

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This video will give you the complete scoop.  Click here  Enjoy!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

 

Seeking Beauty

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“Oh I can’t afford beautiful things”…

How often I hear this from women who are in jobs they hate, barely making ends meet and thinking they won’t find beauty in their life until something changes.

Well, something can change and that something is how we seek beauty.

You don’t have to purchase anything to have beauty in your life.  Here’s one of the ways I seek beauty.

Stress instantly gets replaced by beauty when I walk into a beautiful florist shop.  Gorgeous flower displays in a shop window entice me in.  I just let the colours, smells and atmosphere start filling my brain with happiness.  It’s a beautiful thing.

As always, thank you Florian the Florist, Hove!  It’s always a delight to step inside your shop!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

 

 

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