Women, Bodies & Baggage

love my body

Women’s bodies come with a full set of baggage.  We worry about how fat or thin, tight or saggy, tall or short, young or old,  beautiful or ugly we are.

It all comes down to our bodies and the relationship we have with it.  Whether it’s loving or spiteful we are stuck with it.  It is something we are born with and changes with or without our permission over a lifetime.  It changes, it grows, it develops, it moves, it gets strong, it gets weak and all manner of things in-between.

So how do you treat this ‘thing’ that holds you up and moves you through the world.  Perhaps because of that very fact alone we should learn to like it more.

Here are 8 ways you can take good care of that ‘thing’ you already love, are getting to love or have hated for years.

  1. Like her more by not comparing her to another woman
  2. Feed and water her regularly
  3. Put lotion on her and let her glow
  4. Massage her to help her move with ease
  5. Take her for a walk, bike ride, swim
  6. Sit her down
  7. Let her sleep
  8. Limit the stress and strain you put her under

Showing respect for your body will help you respect your Self and THAT darling, results in you becoming the radiant Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected you were truly meant to be.

With Love,  The Burnout Queens xx

 

 

 

An HSP opinion of being gracious

2 women whispering 1

If someone shares their dream, vision, or idea with you and you see they are clearly excited …

What do you do?  How do you respond?  What do you say?

When I share my enthusiasm about starting a new venture, challenging myself personally, or uprooting my life, I am generally met with great curiosity, support and love from those around me (except my mother of course, but darlings, that’s a whole other story).

I’ve also met those who are  shocked that I will do what I say I want to do “Oh, you mean you’re actually going to Do this (incredulous tone required!) and then

I’ve met those who feel the deep need to be negative, warn you and wonder what’s gotten into you lately? (omg, I know someone who hated what you’re about to do). Why must they warn me or save me from my own choices I wonder?   Can’t they just be happy for me?

So I have to ask, what is the cost of being gracious, even if their choice isn’t yours?

Here’s my best advice the next time someone shares their hopes and dreams with you…

Think before you share and offer

Grace if you must speak.

 

In love and support

The Burnout Queens xx

I Don’t Do Perfect When It Comes To Hoovering | Perfectionism can be a plus

BOQ-vintage-perfectionism

There I was hurriedly hoovering yesterday when I ran out of cord.  Do I run up the stairs and move it down or….hmmm I thought,  “Do I really have to reach every nook and crannie down here?” …to which my inner voice yelled a resounding “No!”  Then I ‘heard’ a most surprising thought;

“I don’t do perfect when it comes to hoovering!”

Next thoughts…  “What can I do ‘perfect’ on then?  When is ‘perfect’ allowable?”  (Yes, if you are wondering, I do often have conversations with my Self like this! It’s a Highly Sensitive woman’s perogative!).

Here is what I came up with.  I go for ‘perfect’ when I am editing or following a recipe, stuff like that.  Of course it doesn’t necessarily mean it comes out perfectly.  Ideas, for instance, are never perfect and the best of recipes can certainly fail.

Being ‘perfect’ and being a ‘perfectionist’ are 2 different things.
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I gave up perfectionism decades ago!  What a relief.  Now I am a selective perfectionist.  I decide pro-actively what I choose to be ‘perfect’ about.   I will unapologetically try for ‘perfect’ on some things, like making sure there are no typos in this article.  (Now some perfectionist out there is going to search for one…should I give them one?)  Coming from this new view of being or doing perfect is vastly different than believing from the bottom of my soul that I am not good enough unless I am ‘perfect’.  I mean, after all… Perfect at what?  Perfect how?  Perfect when?  I never could, and still can’t, answer these questions.

Being an unfulfilled perfectionist only brings angst!
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Having embraced ‘selective perfectionism’ means I have grown to the point of being pretty OK with goofing-up.   Say, for example, choosing ‘the perfect’ paint colour for a room, if you are anything like me that might take a few tries!  (Apologies to Nancy, my interior designer back in Canada to whom I promised, hand on heart, never to pick a colour again!)  Now, in the past, not choosing the ‘perfect’ colour would have been a huge personal failure.  Now, I’m more likely to laugh or cringe.  It’s just paint, so I paint again…or find another designer!

Embrace being a ‘selective’ perfectionist, love your ‘perfect’ side and know what it’s great for!

Wow, so there is an upside to boring old hoovering!  It’s good for thinking about stuff… even unperfect ideas like this.  So, our Darling Burnout Queens, crowns off to perfectionism!  I’m off to hoover!

Carry on and be perfect!

Love, Dr Toby & Dr Bev xx

PS.  The BOQs would love to hear from you!  Leave your wisdom and comments in the box below.

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