mindset

Castles, business and the steep climb

12-lewes-castle

This summer I had the good fortune of visiting two castles in the SE of England.  They are both beautiful ancient structures that require a bit of legwork to take advantage of magnificant views from the top of what’s called ‘the castle keep’.

I didn’t climb the tallest, but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity at Lewes Castle’s Keep which is the remaining structure still standing from the 1060’s (think about this for a moment)!  To say the view is breathtaking over the South Downs is an understatement.

It was a 35 step climb (I can be OCD on these things) and while I was on my way up I thought this is just like building a business.  Bear with me, my mind can jump into biz mode when least expected.

I climbed the first flight not knowing how far up it would go and it landed me in an open space where I could catch my breath and look at a view much higher than where I had started from.  Next flight got narrower, steeper and I was a little winded (and relieved) by the time I reached the next plateau.  The view was amazing and now, although I could see the ultimate steepness of the last flight to the top,  I was eager to go.  I could sense the excitement of climbing out onto the top of the Keep, although I didn’t know exactly what to expect.  The last climb was hard and left me breathless, but I was so glad I didn’t turn away and descend before I had challenged myself on the last leg of the staircase.  The reward was worth every moment.

It really is like building your business.  You start at the bottom and you don’t know where the top is.  Each climb gets you to a new plateau, giving you new knowledge and perspective on what you are doing and why.  You plan the next phase and then it’s time to take action by stretching yourself further.  Each time you stretch and climb you need that little extra muscle, energy and focus to reach the top…even when you don’t know what is waiting.

I love a learning curve and I love discovery.  35 steps to the top may seem small, but when it’s an ancient ruin full of tiny stone steps, a steep climb and openings narrow enough to barely accommodate a bow and arrow those 35 steps are profoundly magical.

Ready to climb?

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

10 Years Stronger and loving it

strong-womanThe Realm’s weekly postcard with it’s assignment arrived in my inbox this past Sunday. It made me think about the question and how I would answer it, and so I posted in our private facebook page.

Then I thought, this is important, so I’m sharing it here as well.

 

The assignment for this week’s The Realm postcard asked our members to think not about their age, but about what or how age has changed them for the better over the last 10 years.  So here was my answer….

” 10 years on and I am stronger and more able to say NO to people and things that aren’t right for me.  How did I come to this?  After several ‘crazy and manipulative’ people in my life pre UK and here as well, I can clearly and quickly see the train wreck coming towards me, so I say NO and get out.  It may look like I’m a rude or unfriendly person, but having experienced prolonged relationships with friends, colleagues and family members who were not good for my health and mind, I have learned I have a choice to look after me.”

Here are my examples (and feel free to leave yours in the comments below)

  • If someone blames me for something they clearly did themselves…they are banished quickly (my new Burnout Queen rules)
  • If someone undermines, smears or belittles me and what I know in order to bolster their own inadequacies…they are banished immediately.
  • If someone wants to talk only and always about themselves, and never asks about me…they are given a few chances…and then they are banished forever!

Some people will judge this as b**chy (and believe you me they have and on several occasions convinced me I was) but I don’t mind because 10 years on, my heart is in the right place and I am firm about what I have learned the hard way.

Life post-burnout is ‘very’ different thankfully.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

 

Rest for the Soul

dandelionWe awoke to a great new research study being talked about on BBC Breakfast earlier this week.  It’s called The Anatomy of Rest and perhaps you’ve heard about it by now.  If not, let us share some of the findings with you.

We are talking about REST, which is not to be confused with Sleep.  There has been plenty of research conducted on sleep patterns, amount of sleep, sleep deprivation, etc, etc, etc.  For the first time there is a study on rest.  18,000 people  from 134 countries took a Rest Test by BBC Radio 4 and Wellcome Collection’s researchers Hubbub.  What do you think they found?

The findings are bang on with what we at The Burnout Queens and all our community of highly sensitive and exhausted women know all too well.  We need and want more rest!

2/3 of the people in this study said they wanted more rest.  When asked what would rest look like, it came in different forms, everything from sleeping, sipping coffee, sitting in front of the TV and doing ultramarathons.  The top ‘rest activity’ came as a surprise to the research team… Reading. The other top activities were ‘being in nature’, music and being alone.  It seems the majority of us need and want regular solitude to rest and restore ourselves.

So why don’t we rest more?  The report showed we feel guilty when we squeeze out time for ourselves.  I don’t think this is surprising to women.  We feel selfish and self-centred (which means our guilt and stress rises) when we take time away from everything and everybody else in our lives to have a quiet moment for us. Women are already living in a state of exhaustion and don’t think they have the ‘time’ to recoup.  We have to turn that notion on it’s head. The ultimate gift we can give ourselves is to consciously and deliberately create an inner calm that will make us more resilient to the outside world.

Now here’s the easy part. The Burnout Queens have designed a fast, simple and extremely effective group of  21audios and videos that help you create that inner calm and resilience needed in your everyday life.  Quiet the Buzz of Everyday Life…creating calm for the Highly Sensitive Woman can be done anywhere, anytime; walking, shopping, waiting for the kids, on your break, waiting for your latte.  Promise.

Why not see for yourself and solve the dilemma of rest, calm and quiet within yourself?!?   Watch our video about Quiet the Buzz and get yourself started now

Embrace the calm!

With love, The Burnout Queens

 

Quirky doesn’t mean crazy!

sunglass FreddieThis page on our website (you’ve been to our website right!) gets people breathing a sigh of relief every time they read it!

If you’ve heard you are ‘too’ something all your life, you might want to check out our Top 14 ‘too’ words that sum up being highly sensitive.

Have a read and remember, it doesn’t make you crazy…just sort of quirky.

 

Top 14 “YOU’RE TOO” phrases Highly Sensitive People hear!

  1. ‘too’ emotional
  2. ‘too’ shy
  3. ‘too’ intense
  4. ‘too’ serious
  5. ‘too’ moody
  6. ‘too’ artsy
  7. ‘too’ idealistic
  8. ‘too’ neurotic

There are more obviously but it all ends with You’re Just Too Sensitive!

Have you heard these ‘too’ words all your life?  They don’t make you crazy, although we bet you have felt like you were every time you heard them.  No, these just mean you are a HSP – Highly Sensitive Person.

At the Burnout Queens we celebrate being Highly Sensitive!  We’re HSPs ourselves, and we are No shrinking violets!   Being an HSP means you are strong, bold, creative, quirky, and much more.  Find out what it really means to be highly sensitive and how it affects everything from your identity to your relationships.

Highly Sensitive

The #1 feedback on this page is…”thank you, I thought I was just crazy all my life!” Nectar to our ears!

Embrace the True You!   The Burnout Queens xx

I Work Differently Now and Love It!

staycation time

Over the last months we have been working, working, working on new programmes, by choice…but have to say…working ‘overtime’ certainly doesn’t resemble the past.  Then it was 18 hour days; racing from office, to hospital, to university, to private practice, then home quickly to look after ill cats and aging parents.  It was madness but necessary and unavoidable.

On the contrary, these days work often starts with a quiet dog walk to the park, a breakfast looking out the roof terrace at the English Channel, a walk to the local for bread and dinner dessert, a play time with dogs, and afternoon tea break to clear the head.

Sounds too good to be true?  Sometimes it feels it!  After living a life of unrelenting stress and strain and driving ourselves into the ground (literally) this new life of enlightened balance  (aka burnout-free lifestyle) makes our hearts sing!

And that’s blissful!

Can you make a few changes to your usual routine to make life more enjoyable?

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

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