Be Calm | The Burnout Queens

Quirky doesn’t mean crazy!

August 18, 2016

This page on our website (you’ve been to our website right!) gets people breathing a sigh of relief every time they read it!

If you’ve heard you are ‘too’ something all your life, you might want to check out our Top 14 ‘too’ words that sum up being highly sensitive.

Have a read and remember, it doesn’t make you crazy…just sort of quirky.

Top 14 “YOU’RE TOO” phrases Highly Sensitive People hear!

‘too’ emotional
‘too’ shy
‘too’ intense
‘too’ serious
‘too’ moody
‘too’ artsy
‘too’ idealistic
‘too’ neurotic

There are more obviously but it all ends with You’re Just Too Sensitive!

Have you heard these ‘too’ words all your life? They don’t make you crazy, although we bet you have felt like you were every time you heard them. No, these just mean you are a HSP – Highly Sensitive Person.

At the Burnout Queens we celebrate being Highly Sensitive! We’re HSPs ourselves, and we are No shrinking violets! Being an HSP means you are strong, bold, creative, quirky, and much more. Find out what it really means to be highly sensitive and how it affects everything from your identity to your relationships.

Highly Sensitive

The #1 feedback on this page is…”thank you, I thought I was just crazy all my life!” Nectar to our ears!

Embrace the True You! The Burnout Queens xx

5 Things That Frustrate Me!

August 8, 2016

These ‘things’ I’m about to list truly get my blood pressure rising…and quickly….

See if any of these hit a nerve for you too.

1. Technology (like the keyboard on this blogsite) that jumps around the page, erases my words without my permission and doesn’t load the pictures I want it to!

2. Technology having a language all to itself, so that when I go to order a new mobile (cell) phone, I can’t properly discuss what giggabytes, megabytes, little bits, big bits that are needed with the sales guy on the other line.

3. Ordering technology. If you want to order over the phone then trying to find a contact number is like finding a needle in a haystack. Why do I have to order ‘online’ all the time. What ever happened to the personal touch.

4. Using technology to talk to someone long distance. Why is it that every time I am set to speak to a client via Skype (I have a paid subscription) Skype decides it’s time for them to update my system. Really, you are getting in the way of my calls!

5. Technology security updates everything on my desktop during the day (lovely feature that my computer guy installed)…but if I’m in the middle of writing something out on my computer, it slows everything down until it’s done.

Let me add a final note here. I don’t like being controlled by my computer! I will never get used to this and I don’t think I want to either. After all personal control should be something that is under my control…shouldn’t it?!?

Now that I’ve had my say, I think I will find some peaceful place to sit…far away from technology…and let nature control things for a bit. I believe in ‘her’ more than I will ever believe in technology.

Love, Dr B (a frustrated Burnout Queen at this moment)

PS: Then I’m off to re-read Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected. Have you got your copy as well?

Our Hearts Are Cold With Fear

July 13, 2016

Three months ago we heard that a friend had gone missing. At the time we had no idea what could have happened to her. It was widely reported that she may have simply ‘disappeared from her life on purpose’. She wouldn’t have done this; she was an intelligent, accomplished, savvy, gentle soul and would not have hurt the people around her like this.

Our hearts were cold with fear because we knew from all our many years of education and practice in the field of women’s studies and women’s psychology that the sad but still true fact is the mere fact of being a woman puts you at risk.

Yesterday we found out that the police had arrested a man she had come to trust in her life on suspicion of murder. They have still not found Helen. We feel sick with our own personal grief but we also feel angry.

The majority of women who are killed are killed by trusted males in their lives. Domestic violence is still one of the leading causes of injury and death for women.

It’s not only the ‘night’ that we need to take back, we need to take back our world. It isn’t right that we have to even think about, let alone worry about, going out alone at night, what you are wearing, how you are looking, what you say, who you flirt with or even who you live with. It’s just not right.

For decades we have asked, oh let’s be truthful, begged women to read this brilliant book and then to give it to their daughters, granddaughters, sisters and nieces and then friends daughters, granddaughters, sisters and nieces. The book is called:

The Gift of Fear. Survival Signals That Protect Us From Violence by Gavin De Becker. Published by Little, Brown and Company in 1997.

(sadly I’ve been told to add this one line…we are not receiving any payment for promoting this book)

We have to start somewhere to take back our world, this book offers all of us a good starting point.

So in honour of Helen, our lovely Helen and her mini-dachs Boris, please take care of yourself, please read, please please trust your intuition and protect yourself. And then…live the fullest life you can. We can all do this for Helen.

In love and light, The Burnout Queens xx

An HSP opinion of being gracious

June 13, 2016

If someone shares their dream, vision, or idea with you and you see they are clearly excited …

What do you do? How do you respond? What do you say?

When I share my enthusiasm about starting a new venture, challenging myself personally, or uprooting my life, I am generally met with great curiosity, support and love from those around me (except my mother of course, but darlings, that’s a whole other story).

I’ve also met those who are shocked that I will do what I say I want to do “Oh, you mean you’re actually going to Do this (incredulous tone required!) and then

I’ve met those who feel the deep need to be negative, warn you and wonder what’s gotten into you lately? (omg, I know someone who hated what you’re about to do). Why must they warn me or save me from my own choices I wonder? Can’t they just be happy for me?

So I have to ask, what is the cost of being gracious, even if their choice isn’t yours?

Here’s my best advice the next time someone shares their hopes and dreams with you…

Think before you share and offer

Grace if you must speak.

In love and support

The Burnout Queens xx

Spring Cleaning HSP-style

May 26, 2016

When Spring arrived, everyone was talking about spring-cleaning the house, the garden, washing the car, mending the curtains and fixing the fence! All of that sounds lovely and inspiring and encouraging. It will make us feel better to put the new paint on the walls, get the old out and make room for the new.

Of course, that got me thinking. All those make-overs outside ourselves will make us happier and feel more organised, but dear one, what if we take that concept and apply it just to little-old-you! Have you spring cleaned your life yet?

Yes, let’s spring clean you! Whoosh that sounds kinda weird, but before you get offended, why not try freshening your ‘self’ up this spring.

Spring may be the perfect time to take stock of yourself and give a heave-hoe to the old stuff and a welcome mat to the new!

Here are 8 challenges that will give you and your life a fresh-air newness.

Challenge your brain. Make a new routine to your day.
Challenge your emotions. Create new rituals (not chores) that you enjoy.
Challenge your spirit. Clear your energy by saying kinder things to you and others (get rid of the swearing and cursing, it doesn’t become a queen).
Challenge your perspective. Look for positives in your life and bin the negatives.
Challenge your heart. Send your outworn styles to charity. Give some other woman less fortunate the opportunity to feel beautiful.
Challenge your creativity. Make a beautiful space, even if it’s a little corner or small surface. Air freshener that makes you smile, candle that calms, colours you love, most classy-comfy armchair to curl up in.
Challenge your self. Take pictures of yourself and see what others see. If you don’t like what you see, change her!
Challenge your desire. Start a piggy-bank for anything you want it to be for. Keep investing in your dream, who knows when that little piggy will crack!

Remember you need to put yourself on the spring clean list every year, along with all the household cleaning. What better way to ensure you feel alive and invigorated again. After all, isn’t that what Spring is all about?

Challenge You. Clear the clutter and feel the freedom!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx