overwhelm

Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected! (tip 10)

If you are ready to “Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected!”, you will certainly have to try this great little tip….

(excerpt from Be The Queen of Calm, Cool & Collected! 60 fabulous tips to help you live with less pressure and more ease! by The Burnout Queens)

 

Tip No 10: 

Go ahead and giggle!  Laughter relieves tension, makes us breathe more deeply, releases ‘happy’  brain chemicals (legal ones), relaxes our muscles, and makes us feel more relaxed overall.   How perfect!

Highly Sensitive Women sometimes forget to laugh out loud so purposely look for things that make you laugh.

  • Plan lunch or coffee with that special friend who always has you in stitches.
  • Turn on the comedy station instead of the news.
  • Watch a classic comedy that makes you laugh even when you know what’s coming.

Good for the face, good for the heart and great for the soul!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Ready to Leap?

ready to leap

Then by all means…Let’s Leap!

Two years ago this month, we decided our work needed to take a major leap forward, much like we did with our whole life 7 years ago when we moved from Canada to London UK.  A good, dare we say GREAT (of course we dare!) rebrand requires leaping and landing in a totally new place, and that is what we have proudly done.  Two years ago, The Burnout Queens made the royal leap and we have not looked back!

Everything, everyone, is soooo results oriented these days, it’s numbers this and numbers that, you know, ‘how many followers, how many likes, how many tweets, how many programmes, how many clients’. If you love excel sheets and counting it all up then that’s wonderful.  But really the massive reward for us is always in the leap itself. 

When you Leap you get to have fun and find yourself all over again: a new way to look at things, present things…a whole new voice!  Leaping is invigorating, fun, scary, challenging, and creative!   We were absolutely on board for this.

But we practice what we preach! Too too much hard work makes The Burnout Queens tooooo boring, so a day at the Seaside watching someone else take the ‘leap’ was just what we needed before we roll out even more fabulous newness!

Refreshed and Ready…we’re about to leap!

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

4 Ways You Don’t Know Something

4 with crownWhy do I always have to know what the answer is!?! 

If you find this question familiar.  If everyone always looks to you to know the answer to something.  And if you don’t want to know something for once in your life…. here are 4 super ways to decline knowing and not feel the guilt.  Repeat after me!

4 Ways to Decline Knowing Something (no guilt)

  1.  BEATS ME!
  2. YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE!
  3. HAVEN’T A CLUE!
  4. NOT MINE TO KNOW!

Put them in your little vocabulary book and the next time you’re exhausted and still someone wants you to come up with the answer, start repeating…

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

(excerpt from The Burnout Queens’ Postcard from The Realm)  If you would like to receive more of The Realm’s wisdom every Sunday and learn to Defy Ordinary in your life, you are invited to join our free global women’s group by registering here. The Realm membership

Assertiveness For HSPs!

A little effort takes away the ordinary

As a highly sensitive, intelligent and creative woman you may have a natural HSP tendency to ‘pause-to-check’.  Brief overview, ‘pause-to-check’ comes from our need for a little caution.

We can use this to our advantage by turning it into what we call ‘pause-to-respond’ moments and banish the regret of not getting across your idea clearly.  This way, when you do speak up you are heard perfectly!  Here’s how:

5 quick ways to power up your pause-to-respond skill.

  1. Buy time – Need a longer pause, be assertive with, “I’ll get back to you on that”.
  2. Ask Self – Take your ‘pause’ moment to consider what you really want to say.
  3. Silence can be golden. Maybe, just maybe, a non-response is the right way to go. Silence speaks volumes.
  4. Own what you want to say – If you have already responded, but had second thoughts (or 100th thought if an HSP!) return and re-say. “I’ve been thinking about what I said, and what I would have liked to say or truly meant was…”.
  5. Respond thoughtfully – Take your time and don’t be rushed. You may feel like it’s forever, but it will only take you seconds longer to speak thoughtfully and mindfully.

If you found these 5 quick responses helpful and want more of our HSP-specific gems all you have to do is become a member of The Realm! and enjoy your postcards every Sunday.

The Realm!, is a free club for women who want to Defy Ordinary.  We are creative, sensitive and ‘very’ global.  Register here and receive your instant member’s access information.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Divine Madness | Love Your Work!

divine-madness-banner

The Burnout Queens love Love; big Love, small Love, puppy Love!  Of course we are talking about Love today, check the date!  (There are times we love to be predictable!)  In past years we’ve ‘done’ Love (with a capital L), we’ve definitely talked about self-love and yes we have even explored the steamy kind, but love of work, loving what you do, is not necessarily the dot that gets connected to hearts and flowers.

Plato referred to love as ‘divine madness’ and Freud believed that two of the most important aspects of life were love and work.  So is it madness to believe you need to love your work to be healthy and happy?  The Burnout Queens don’t think so!

We have a very real need to love what we do… our work, the product, our art, our contribution and our success.
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If we connect love with work we should expect big moments of passion, true calling, momentous insights, or at least a big ‘kissy fest’ with our colleagues all the time…right?   Not necessarily so.

It can be a challenge to notice signs, big or small, of the kind of love that means your work is engaging your soul.  These signs often hide in the everyday, the mundane, the tedious and the commonplace.  So what exactly are you looking for?

Well, when you work with mindfulness you begin to identify signs of loving what you do: a moment of pride for a well done job; a rush of warmth, understanding or caring toward a co-worker;  the comfortable familiarity of an everyday task; the old books on the shelves in the boardroom; taking a moment to ‘see’ the painting you love on your office wall, the view outside your window; knowing you are doing ‘good’ work or providing for your life and family.

Here are some moments of love in my work:

black-heart15Typing this draft with my soul-dog on my lap (not great for my posture but fab for my heart),
black-heart15Receiving a ‘Hello here’s what I’m up to!’ from a long-ago (but never forgotten) client,
black-heart15Having an ‘ah hah moment’ when two seemingly diverse ideas collide and become something new...BIG LOVE!
black-heart15Writing that flows from the heart.
black-heart15A hot cup of tea and biscuit on the corner of my desk.
black-heart15Being ‘told’ to take a break by a ball dropped on my foot or thrown down the stairwell followed by barking!
black-heart15Receiving baby pictures, pet pictures, family pictures from clients new and old.
black-heart15Taking a brain-break by editing something already written (ah relax).
black-heart15Dropping a quick “Thinking of you” to a client for no reason other than to connect.
black-heart15Hearing the birds in the tree outside my window.
black-heart15Looking up to see the picture of Dad on my bookshelf.
black-heart15Stopping to read the Burnout Queens Desiderata (You mean you haven’t got one? Join the Realm Darlings!)

Let’s be honest we can all lose the love of our work from time to time! 

There will be days you don’t feel like showing up, but don’t make the mistake of thinking this means you don’t love what you do!

Stress, pressures, deadlines, dreaded tasks, the evil boss or conniving colleague, or just the tedium of the everyday can trick even the most enlightened and sensitive amongst us into missing (or possibly avoiding or ignoring) many opportunities to connect with the love of what you do.

In the BIG picture we all want to be happy at work.  We want our work to be engaging, pleasurable and fun at times.  We truly want to feel like we are doing something that contributes to the wellbeing of others in the world.  That sense of contributing is love personified.

Yes there are times when we drag ourselves ‘to the office’ moaning, but there are other times when maybe life is in turnoil that work becomes a place of refuge, a sanctuary.  Just the other day a client whose world has been turned upside down said it so clearly, “Thank goodness for my work, it’s keeping me sane!”  There was a time that my office became my retreat, my haven of peace, from family illness, crises and loss.  It was physically a peaceful and serene place, I loved my clients, and when ‘in session’ I was unavailable to the outside world!  What’s not to love.

Even if you aren’t currently in your ideal job or career, allow yourself to love aspects of what you are doing.

Finding love for what you do in the present doesn’t mean you can’t dream about the future and embrace change when it comes.
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Love for your work, in whatever nooks and crannies you can find it, opens up your imagination, your creativity and awakens your soul.

Being a highly sensitive woman means you were delightfully designed to find work you love but first you have to find love in your work. 

 

From our hearts to yours…Happy Valentines Day!

 

Love, Dr Toby & Dr Bev xx

PS.  The BOQs would love to hear from you!  Leave your wisdom and comments in the box below.

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