mindset

Assertiveness For HSPs!

A little effort takes away the ordinary

As a highly sensitive, intelligent and creative woman you may have a natural HSP tendency to ‘pause-to-check’.  Brief overview, ‘pause-to-check’ comes from our need for a little caution.

We can use this to our advantage by turning it into what we call ‘pause-to-respond’ moments and banish the regret of not getting across your idea clearly.  This way, when you do speak up you are heard perfectly!  Here’s how:

5 quick ways to power up your pause-to-respond skill.

  1. Buy time – Need a longer pause, be assertive with, “I’ll get back to you on that”.
  2. Ask Self – Take your ‘pause’ moment to consider what you really want to say.
  3. Silence can be golden. Maybe, just maybe, a non-response is the right way to go. Silence speaks volumes.
  4. Own what you want to say – If you have already responded, but had second thoughts (or 100th thought if an HSP!) return and re-say. “I’ve been thinking about what I said, and what I would have liked to say or truly meant was…”.
  5. Respond thoughtfully – Take your time and don’t be rushed. You may feel like it’s forever, but it will only take you seconds longer to speak thoughtfully and mindfully.

If you found these 5 quick responses helpful and want more of our HSP-specific gems all you have to do is become a member of The Realm! and enjoy your postcards every Sunday.

The Realm!, is a free club for women who want to Defy Ordinary.  We are creative, sensitive and ‘very’ global.  Register here and receive your instant member’s access information.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

Something’s new inside The Realm

postcard-bannerSomething’s new inside The Realm!

For our members of The Realm, we’ve archived all the Sunday postcards in the Reading Room inside the membership site.  Use your private log-in details and click the Reading Room icon to get all the links.

Why not use this opportunity to refresh your memory, take another read and redo your weekly assignment.  Remember, small steps, big impact.

In support of Defying Ordinary,  Love The Burnout Queens xx

PS:  If you aren’t a private member, but would love to join our global community of women as they creatively Defy Ordinary for themselves, feel free to register yourself.  You will get instant access to our community on facebook (private group) and all the materials in the member’s access area.  Register here:  https://theburnoutqueens.com/the-realm/

 

Wateraid gives us feedback on caring

wateraidHow absolutely lovely to receive a note from Water Aid on Mothering Sunday in the UK.

Great to know our Christmas Chaos Charity Campaign gifts of taps and bog cement is making a difference in a village birthing centre in Tanzania.

 

Just a special feeling and moment to know we all helped in a very small but powerful way in other womens’ lives on this planet.  Embracing all your kindness and generosity this year.

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

HSP woman wants to build a wall

open living1

Yes I do, I want to build a wall!

Please don’t confuse me with that guy running for US president, but I actually do want to build a wall.  You see, there’s just too much going on these days, and it’s driving me crazy. It’s grating on my nerves, making me irritable, and generally intruding on all my senses.

So what’s going on you ask?  Open plan living! You know living, dining, terrace and kitchen all-in-one. Very hip, very modern, very NOW. So when I initially saw my new flat I was excited with possibilities. In my zest to decorate the space in my head, I neglected to consider how noisy it might become.

When I clock off work, I’m ready for my evening to begin. As a highly sensitive woman, there’s nothing more soothing than a little dim lighting, low hum and watching a bit of television while I get dinner. Well, my gorgeously decorated open living space doesn’t deliver…I want to build a wall!

As a highly sensitive woman yourself, can you guess where I’m going with this? The gas stove is on (noise), the fan for the stove is on (noise), the fridge is opening and closing (noise), the dinner is being prepared, chop, chop, chop (more noise), the water is being poured into saucepans (double noise), the microwave is beeping (noise) and the television is on (turned ever higher to actually hear the news or show,  making it noise over the top).   And don’t even get me started on the Burnout Pups playing ball, barking and generally under foot because work is done and playtime is NOW for them (and I’m not even going to start with the noise of after-dinner cleanup and the dishwasher)!

Humming, banging, barking, bright lights, clanking pots and running water… my now over-aroused and jangled system yearns for that beautifully quiet evening of rest and relaxation.

Suffice to say open plan living for this highly sensitive woman is not a match made in heaven. So I want to build a wall and call the space on the other side ‘my kitchen’.  Old fashioned maybe, quiet most definitely!

Anyone else feel my pain?!?

Love, The Burnout Queens xx

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