burnout
What is burnout; information and understanding of the experience of burning out
Email skills up to snuff? Part 3
Here’s the third Email Mistake that makes all of us look unprofessional according to Inc.com. It’s easy to do when you are bombarded by inbox overload or are squeezed for time. However, this mistake can make the best of us steam with irritation (at least it does me)
Slow response or no response at all.
The Inc article makes it clear that you should acknowledge receiving an email from someone, even if you quickly answer ‘got it’. I am so happy that this is what our VA does each time I send work from the UK to the US. One word from her that it landed in her inbox allows me to just move on knowing the work will be handled. Bless her she’s a highly sensitive person as well, so she ‘gets’ the importance of replies.
However, (this is a big irritation to me and most HSP’s I know) if I send an email with substantial information, opinion or suggestions in it, if I send a client a personalised visualisation, if I email a colleague with a joint business idea…I want to hear that it was received!!!!!! (notice irritation growing.)
You can double my irritation (and confusion) if a colleague or client wants to book time with me, and I take quick action to reply and offer a time slot (time zones are a challenge when working globally) and then I wait for a no-or-slow response…! Nothing irks me more than being asked for something, delivering, and then waiting for confirmation! I am left thinking several things.
- My email never arrived or is languishing somewhere in the Ethernet.
- The request for my time wasn’t that important in the first place (but I am keeping a timeslot open which means it’s still on my mind).
- The person is lazy or impolite because they aren’t checking their inbox…hello (either way I’m starting to steam)!
- They feel they are too busy and oops, ‘sorry it went to the bottom of my to-do list’.
Regardless of the WHY of no-or-slow replies to emails, the article (and I totally agree) suggests we filter and prioritise our emails and always send a quick reply regardless of restraints…(got it, got this, will reply tomorrow, I’ll get back to you on this asap).
I always use these suggestions and I always appreciate when others do the same. Don’t you?
(hello…are you there)
(hello?)
Hmm, note to self, better check this article reached everybody!
Love, The Burnout Queens xx
Check out the other 2 Email Mistakes that Make Us Look Unprofessional.
Email skills up to snuff? Part 2
Last week I shared my HSP reaction to the first of five mistakes that make you look unprofessional when sending emails. It’s a great Inc.com article we love to share, and you can catch the first blog here: https://theburnoutqueens.com/email-skills-up-to-snuff/
This week I want to share my HSP thoughts on the second of the five mistakes that make you look unprofessional when sending emails.
2. Choosing email instead of private messaging.
If you are an HSP like me, there is nothing worse than getting mounds of emails in your inbox each morning (and throughout the day). It sets my ‘overwhelm button’ into virtual overdrive.
I have to admit I used to be guilty of doing this, but no more. When I get it from others though, I thank my lucky stars I listened to Dr Toby saying “quit while you’re ahead!”
What am I talking about?
This article suggests using a private messaging system or sending a text is the perfect way to send off a one-liner to friends, family and colleagues. Don’t keep sending back replies to emails.
How many times have you sent your final thoughts or suggestions for business in an email and the receiver keeps replying with small little phrases to keep the email conversation alive (did I just hear Dr T’s voice again). There is always someone who keeps the string attached by replying ‘ok’, or ‘you’re welcome…no problem’, or ‘me too’, or just ‘yep’. This creates at least five extra emails returning to my inbox.
I DON’T LIKE CROWDS. This is crazy and annoying. I just want to say ‘enough already’, but that would net me another reply I’m sure…
…’sorry’!
Next time you are about to hit the reply button with a little extra something, you might want to try to eliminate the urge to be the ‘nice-friendly-person.’ I think the receiver will understand (I know I will be relieved).
Number three next week. If you have a comment or agree (and disagree) with me, leave your thoughts below. We love hearing from other HSPs!
Love, The Burnout Queens xx
PS: If you want to read the original article click here https://www.inc.com/peter-economy/5-email-mistakes-that-make-you-look-extremely-unprofessional.html?cid=email
Email skills up to snuff?
I love reading my Inc.com online alerts. This one just jumped out at me. “5 Email Mistakes That Make You Look Extremely Unprofessional”
As a highly sensitive entrepreneur I take great pride in how I write my emails. Do you? Well, according to this article you definitely should. As I read it I had reactions to it (as a highly sensitive entrepreneur of course and a psychologist as well) so here’s my opinion on a great article, starting with the first of Peter’s 5 points.
1 Unstructured Criticism: First I hate the word criticism it’s so unconstructive. I prefer feedback because people tend to listen when it’s called feedback. The article says don’t ‘blast negativity at someone through an email’. Yes, words can appear harsher in print without the tone or facial expressions of the messenger.
For us highly sensitive person biz types, we love ‘seeing and hearing’ face and tone movements and levels. It gives me much more scope for the meaning of the words and the overall sense of the message I am being given. This way I definitely know how the messenger feels. Ho-hum, I know this is not always possible so…
The Inc article suggests delivering your criticism in ‘the compliment sandwich’ way! This sounds nice, but when I taught communication 101 at university this type of sandwich while nicer didn’t always digest well, particularly when using words like “great job Sue, but….” I can guarantee that Sue didn’t dwell on the great job part of the message, but she probably ruminated over all the stuff that came after BUT.
(On a psychological note, the truth and reality of a message always comes after the BUT).
The Burnout Queens suggest using kinder words overall. There is no need to be negative. Instead, focus on the strength of the person’s skills and encourage them in your feedback to use their strengths to correct themselves and their work. “Sue I loved the energy and creativity at the beginning of your report. Is there some way you can end it on that same enthusiastic and creative note?” Sue may actually shine and be proud of the outcome.
Next post, I’ll give you the HSP scoop on one more Email Mistake in this article. In the meantime, why not try The Burnout Queens’ Strength Building Feedback Style for the next few days with your colleagues (wink: it works with the kids and yourself as well).
If you’ve been served the compliment sandwich, let us know and what it may you feel like.
Love, The Burnout Queens xx
For the original Inc.com article click here
Too Exhausted for a Life Vision…think again!
The Burnout Queens know that most of our Highly Sensitive Women are tired, frazzled and pulled in every direction in their everyday lives. So to suggest one more thing for them to pack into their lives seems cruel. But…
A Life Vision is just what these doctors order for frazzled, fried and burned out women. We know that on any given day, plans can get interrupted, postponed and forgotten in all the details of ‘being and doing’ for everyone. THAT is precisely why having a Life Vision is so very important to cultivate at different stages of your life. When it all goes sideways, isn’t it better to be able to go back to the drawing board and know you have already drawn something to follow? When the chaos and busyness drop off, you can reconnect with yourself quickly and without much struggle.
Quickly and without struggle. Foreign words to busy women, but they can exist.
On our previous blog (Do You Have a Life Vision) we outlined two of our Ideas about Life Visioning to help you get started and not become overwhelmed. Today we’re offering another two for your consideration.
The Burnout Queens want you to stop struggling and actually think about what it is you want in your life. It’s easier to plan and achieve once the vision (the big picture) is clear. So try these:
Idea: Vision is different than purpose. However, the dreams you have for your life can reveal your purpose to you. Your life purpose is embedded in your life vision at the age of 12 or 20 or 50 or 80 or…
Idea: Dreams come from the realm of “what if” and having a vision or a dream requires truthfulness about who you are and what you want. Truthfulness in your vision does not have to lead to limitation. Vision is expansive, illusion is limiting. Vision lends itself to plans and goals, illusion is a dead end.
Come on Darling. Start dreaming and achieving a life you want to live for yourself. I bet you do it all the time for your family, your friends, your colleagues. It’s time for you to get the big picture for your life and step in!
(It may help to read our March 11th Feature Article: Seeking the Big Picture | Life Vision Means Living Burnout Free here:
Leave us a comment and share what your vision is. We’d love to hear.
With love, The Burnout Queens xx