I’m going to say this right up front, I am a huge fan of decisions. I am a believer.
I unreservedly believe that
One Decision can change your life.
Now I do have to say there are decisions and there are decisions. Everyday all of us make our way through a gazillion decisions from the moment we open our eyes until we close them to go to sleep. I tend to think of these as mini-decisions. Mini-decisions that keep life ticking along and most of them we make without even a second thought. However, these ordinary, everyday decisions are not the decisions I want to talk about.
When I talk about decisions that are life changing I’m talking maxi-decisions. They may not look extra-special on first examination, they may in fact appear simple and ordinary. They don’t really have much panache, like deciding to climb Everest or take a hot air balloon around the world, and they are rarely, in my experience, announced by a drum roll. However, in their quiet simplicity they make your life turn a different corner, redirect or change your life so that it is never quite the same again. At the time you make that One Decision you may not even realise that is what’s happening.
Let me tell you a story about a woman I know who has made many One Decisions throughout her life. Some saved her life and all definitely changed the direction of her life forever.
She was close to thirty, successful at what she did, but totally disillusioned with life and bored out of her mind. Even worse, her life was making her sick; physically, emotionally, and spiritually sick. Then she made a radical decision to quit work and go to university. There were many nea-sayers (aren’t there always!) telling her that she had a good job for a woman (true) and reminding her that she had never finished school in the first place (also true) so how was she going to be successful now. Not one to be deterred she requested an appointment with the Faculty Dean.
When the day came and she raced to the university and breathless and quaking in her pumps was shown into a very large, sombre office only to be met by an equally large, stern looking woman who asked one question, “How can I help you?” She summoned her courage and answered, “I want my PhD.” The Dean stared at her with the same intensity that she saw when she stared at herself in the mirror, then simply said, “Here’s what you have to do.” With that one statement she mapped out the next 15 years of my life. She believed, like I now do, that One Decision is sometimes all it takes to redirect your life. If I made that sound overly simple, it was.
That’s the first thing about making One Decision (I always think of it as capitalized) when the time is right it can be decidedly simple and clear.
I have also discovered over the many One Decisions I have made that everyone around me focused on the hoards of mini-decisions that inevitably follow a maxi-decision. All I heard was a cacophony of “How are you going to do this and what about that?” I didn’t know at the time and that was a good thing because if I had known and focused on all the small stuff (and yes indeed some large stuff) that I would need to work my way through to achieve three degrees over 15 years I would have never started. Luckily (and surprisingly!) I didn’t over-think it, I made that One Decision and then gained courage, confidence, and knowledge with every subsequent step.
That’s the second thing about making One Decision, you won’t know what is going to follow and there is no way you can.
Now, just in case you still aren’t sure of what counts as a maxi-decision here are a few examples from the brilliant women Dr. B and I work with along with a few other epic life-turning One Decisions from our lives.
One Decision to…
- Get out of debt.
- Adopt a child on your own
- Live, yes literally live.
- Retire
- Totally change careers.
- Return to school.
- Leave a relationship.
- Get married.
- Move to a different country.
- Give up city life for the country.
- Exclude someone from your life.
- Do what you want.
- Not have children.
- Stop starving, drinking, or harming oneself.
One Decision, one moment in time when you say,
“I am going to…..”
Everybody’s One Decision looks different but they all have one thing in common – when you make your One Decision your life will never be the same.
Is there One Decision that is calling out to be made in your life right now?
How do you know? Well, if there is, your gut is probably kicking in about now with what feels like uneasiness, or anxiety or maybe, just maybe, a flicker of excitement. You may be burning out, feeling stuck, unhappy or disillusioned with your life. Your intuition has probably been whispering to you, or yelling at you if you refuse to pay attention.
Here’s the third thing about such a decision…you know.
When I’m wrapping up an article I always ask myself if I’ve actually expressed what I really truly wanted to. Usually the answer is a straight forward ‘yes’ (hit send) or ‘no’ (sigh and hit delete). So, just to make sure I’m going to say it again.
One Decision is sometimes all it takes.
True that One Decision may feel like a dive off the high-board and, you know what, it probably is. You can and you will work out the details as you go along. You can and you will sweat it because you care. However, do not overlook, doubt, or forget that you are smart, creative, strong, insightful, powerful, intelligent and you are worth it.
You deserve to live a life that raises you up and sometimes that requires One Decision.
Go ahead, right now, be more courageous than you ever thought you could. Defy ordinary and write down your One Decision. There you go, it’s in the wind. Now it’s time for you to believe.
