Lately I have been overwhelmed by clients who are overwhelmed. In this last couple of weeks many of my VIP clients have contacted me due to being in a state of overwhelm and overarousal. One of my clients calls it, ‘red alert’!
Now, that’s a pretty good description of what it can feel like living with an HSP body and mind that goes on alert and forgets to shift down, shut off, relax, and rest. Now before I continue, let me just say that each and every one of my darling clients is a professional woman, completely adept at handling (or maybe I should say juggling) work, businesses, creativity, family, and personal commitments. In fact, I’m often breathless when I hear how much they are actually trying to fit into their lives, not to mention the day-to-day routine.
I’m highly sensitive myself, and yes I would definitely have in the past labelled myself an over-achiever and perfectionist. I still like to achieve, I still practice selective perfectionism, and I am still accomplishing and striving towards new successes in life. Here’s the difference, I mind my inner OM. I have become truly adept at the delicate balancing act between my physical body, my mind, and last but definitely not least, dealing with what can seem to be the external chaos of the world.
It’s an everyday way of handling things that has developed with knowledge, consciousness raising, self-awareness and having new ways to respond to the inevitable pressures, twists and turns of life each and every ordinary day. I do have to work at it, but my everyday way of creating calm is so informal and simple that it has become seamless in my life. Let me tell you, however, peace of mind, calm and quiet are not necessarily the natural default choice of this HSP body and mind. For me the need to ‘quiet the buzz’ begins the minute I open my eyes.
Most days I wake up with my stomach in knots because my body has screamed “Yikes I’m conscious!”
I used to chastise myself wondering what on earth I could be anxious about within minutes of waking. Now I understand it’s simply my body’s early (sometimes way too early!) warning system going awol over something as ordinary as waking up. This HSP body doesn’t gently and reassuringly welcome the morning, oh no, it’s responds more like a diver surfacing too fast and getting the bends!
I know to expect my initial angst, so I built in my ‘waking pause-to-check’ moment. I listen to the first news item on the radio to reassure myself that the world hasn’t blown-up. all is right with the world. and it’s safe to emerge from the cocoon of sleep.
I try not to ‘insult’ my body by leaping to my feet, my natural inclination in a body that prefers shifting into overdrive! Instead, I take a few minutes to let my inner shock waves settle down, stretch, snuggle the pup and slowly embrace the day.
I gently shuffle into my day with a morning routine that is relaxed and expected.
As much as rainy days bring groans at the thought of the dog walk (both from the dogs and me) I love that half hour of quiet in the beauty of the nearby garden park. I use this time to appreciate moments of mindful awareness of the trees, flowers, the sun, or even the rain on my face. I love watching my little guy enjoying his surroundings. (BTW…the pup’s highly sensitive as well). Then it’s breakfast and a splash of news with an extra cup of tea, some gentle yoga takes care of the body and I’m ready to start work.
Most days I’ve a pretty good idea of what my schedule will be. I’m usually at my desk by 10 or 10:30. I know that sounds luxurious but because I work ‘around the world’ on the telephone I may not finish-up until 7 or 8 at night.
My old Burnout Queen self would have driven herself into the ground with this schedule, but what can I say, I’m wiser and have learned to pace myself. I take breaks, I eat regularly, I stop for afternoon tea (and, yes please, cake), but most importantly I incorporate tiny restorative niches into my day. Tiny breaks that take care of body, mind, and soul: 5 minutes here or there to stretch, a minute to close my eyes and get lost in classical music, a couple of minutes to become aware of my breathing and to refresh my energy with a few complete breaths.
I use a variety of small everyday calming practices like breath awareness, physical relaxation, mindfulness or creative visualisation (like having an ‘ejection step’ for the next person who rings the bell with a delivery for my neighbour…see them fly through the air…and relax!). My aim is to minimise tension before it builds into stress physically or mentally and to restore a sense of equilibrium and harmony to my inner self. That way I handle the outer stuff way better!
When it comes to relaxation ‘little and often’ simply makes sense to my body, mind, and crazy schedule.
Of course life can still get pretty overwhelming with all the ‘real’ stuff we all have to do. Sometimes there is no getting away from it all. I want all of you to know that even when you are having a revolving door kind of day, you can make a choice to let yourself off the proverbial hook, shift gears for a minute here and there, you can even tear up the plans completely if it fits!
Being able to let go of things, slow down a little here and there, be able to see the humour in wanting to rip off the plumbers head is well within your reach. It is absolutely doable.
You know, my Lovely, creating calm is another way for you to embrace life, because when it comes down to it there’s waking up, living your day, and going to bed. All the loop de loops in between that at times bring us to our knees are simply life…wonderful, unpredictable, challenging, entertaining, annoying, but ultimately amazing life.
P.S. The BOQs would love to hear from you! Leave your wisdom and comments in the box below.