Day 2: About to Snap like A Christmas Kracker? 

Day 2: It’s About Aunt Flossie’s Candy Cane Trifle!

About to Snap like A Christmas Kracker?
The Burnout Queen’s 12 Days of Holiday Stress Relief will help you through.

Day 2:  It’s About Aunt Flossie’s Candy Cane Trifle! 

The BIG holiday rule is that you can never break the holiday rules.  After all your Great Great Great Aunt Flossie made her famous candy cane trifle for the first time and we’ve had it every year since!  It’s tradition!

Do you dread some of the usual holiday traditions and get queasy when you think of breaking them? Time to sit down with a cuppa and have a really honest think about them.  What do they mean to you?  Do they make you smile at the memories, snarl or want to weep?

So keep the ones that are meaningful and cross off the ones that no longer fit!  Worried about ruffling some turkey feathers?  Keep in mind that it will all be over by January 2!

Make this the year you start some traditions of your own.  Reinvigorate the holidays with something new!

Be bold,
Dr Toby & Dr Bev
The Burnout Queens

p.s. Please feel free to share these with our Holiday blessings!

Day 1: About to Snap like A Christmas Kracker?

12 Days of Holiday Stress Relief

About to Snap like A Christmas Kracker?
The Burnout Queen’s 12 Days of Holiday Stress Relief will help you through.

Day 1:  On The First Day Of….Make A List!  Make 2!

List everything you have to do, should do, ought to do, would like to do, have promised to do during the holidays.  Then get real!

Immediately cross off the ‘shoulds and ought tos’ and then divvy your tasks up  with this fabulously simple method.

First:  Focus on your ‘Absolute Musts’.  These are pretty obvious.

Second:  Decide on your ‘Great Ifs’. You know these ones, “Time permitting it would be ‘great if’ I could get to [fill in the blank]”.

Third:  [Oh we love these] ‘If onlys’!  “If all Santa’s helpers showed-up I could paint my whole house in 2 days time!”  And, Mrs. Claus would supply the treats!

Of course Christmas is a magical time, but save the magic for sugar plums and not your To Do list!

It’s good to believe,

Dr Toby & Dr Bev
The Burnout Queens

p.s. Please feel free to share these with our Holiday blessings!

Hello from the English countryside! 8 September 2020

Hello from London & Lewes

Hello from the English countryside | The Burnout Queens

A personal note from Dr T & Dr B.  We hope you are staying safe and well.  During the Covid-19 global pandemic we are all searching for that ‘new normal’ in our lives: we can’t go back, we are limited moving forward, but we can live fully in the present.  For many of us that has meant rethinking values and rethinking where and how we live.  For many home is even more important as a refuge and comfort and, my darlings, that’s what this issue is all about.

Home is where the heart is.

Home for The Burnout Queens means comfort, security, style, ambience and expression.  Our HSP hearts and minds were in need of idyllic rolling fields, stone villages, hip towns, sheep, cows, horses and lots of peace and quiet.  So we found ourselves a little farm cottage that fits the bill and began a new chapter in our lives.

We had been thinking about this move for quite awhile, in fact before we even left Canada it was part of the ‘big’ plan.  Now it was time to put our plan into motion so we could live in harmony with our values and desire to live more simply and leisurely.

It’s official, we are countrified.

During the Covid-19 lockdown we moved to a small country village.  It was a relief to make it happen before total lockdown hit.  However, trying to rebuild a lifestyle when nothing was open has proved to be a huge and difficult challenge.

We had prepared and planned.  Last year we began Nordic walking and now find it a great way to walk, climb and see the countryside in a very personal way.  We never imagined that we would be trekking through fields past big historic houses or climbing footpath ladders, but here we are!

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

We challenged ourselves to plant a vegetable and flower garden to enjoy. (our friend and VA sang ‘Green Acres’ to us and she wasn’t far off).  After frustrating weeks of waiting for deliveries everything arrived at once!  Not shy of hard work Dr T and Dr B used muscle-might (and the wheelbarrow a sympathetic neighbour loaned to us) to move 1 tonne of soil into new raised beds.  The plants are now standing tall and producing a great crop for dinners with extras to share with new neighbours.

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

The walks around us are peaceful although not always quiet.  We have discovered just how loud sheep can be.  There is history everywhere we look; a church here, a Manor House there, and farms and fields that have existed for centuries.

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

The architecture is different in this new area; gone are castles, shops and brick structures replaced by thatched stone cottages, village churches, Manor Houses and many quirky little buildings.  It is definitely quintessential English countryside.

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

Our nature neighbours seem to have their own diverse architectural homes. Believe us when we say, that beyond the expected robins and sparrows, we had not exactly banked on getting up close and personal with this new curious neighbour!

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

 

English countryside | The Burnout Queens

Lockdown is easing in the UK so that means we can hop in the car and explore the backroads.  We look forward to sharing our new journey with you…even when we frequently get lost!

Stay well, stay safe.  We hope that home is truly where your heart is.

Until next time, love from Farm Cottages.

The Many Styles of Highly Sensitive Women | We Are. No apologies.

The Many Styles of Highly Sensitive Women | The Burnout Queens

Many years of knowing and working with Highly Sensitive women (and being one myself) has shown me what a diverse group we are.  It is nothing short of infuriating to see HSPs portrayed as ‘shrinking violets’ or so vulnerable that they need to take special care when out in the world.

I don’t think I’m the only one that gets annoyed when reading advice suggesting that if you are Highly Sensitive it would be a good idea to notify those around you so that others, at work or at home, can accommodate or make allowances and adjustments for your sensitivities!  If that doesn’t set you up to feel ‘different’ in a not-so-good way, or feel like there is something ‘wrong’ with you, I don’t know what would.  The attitude of ‘be careful with us’ diminishes us.

We don’t need or want others to ‘be careful with us’ we simply want others to respect who we are, who we were born to be.

Highly Sensitive women are strong, resilient, talented, and quite able to take on the world, thank you very much.  We may be quiet and reflective but when we are in full swing, nothing stops us.  You may see us as cautious (and truthfully many of us believe we are ‘too’ cautious at times) but we are the members of your team who will see any potential pitfalls or errors, we will ‘cross the T’s and dot the I’s’ so to speak.  We see things others do not.  Call it intuition, psychic ability, good guessing or enhanced brain waves.  Whatever or however you see our ability to read between the lines, you better believe it is real.

Of one thing you can be sure (and proud), whatever we do, we do with heart and soul.  And…passion.

Passion fills us with joy.  Passion gives us the energy we need to keep going in the face of difficulty.  Passion overcomes our fear when we need to fight for what is right and just, two things we passionately believe in.

Without passion we suffocate.

Most people think that anyone who is sensitive is automatically an Introvert.  Well, not true.  Quite a few highly sensitive individuals are Extroverts and many more are simply able to draw on both their introvert strengths and their extrovert abilities.  We are actually very adaptable and flexible!  It is true that we often like ‘alone’ time to recharge our batteries, but that does not mean that we are anti-social or fearful of the world at large.  It simply means that we love peace and quiet, even solitude.  No apologies.

As I write this I am flooded with memories of talented, strong and powerful Highly Sensitive women.  So let me sum us up…

We are world travellers.

We are techies.

We are artists and performers.

We are scientists.

We are daughters, sisters, mums, and grandmothers.

We are partners.

We are leaders.

We are philosophers.

We are environmentalists.

We are animal rights activists.

We are healers.

We are wise women.

We are.

Until Next Time…Defy Ordinary!

Cupid Is Getting On My Nerves! | With Love HSPs Can Change The World!

Cupid Is Getting On My Nerves! | The Burnout Queens

Here’s my dilemma, I’ve been sitting at my computer waiting for divine intervention.  You see it’s Valentine’s Day and everytime I attempt to write something thoughtful Cupid hijacks my mind with all things red, rosey, and chocolatey!  Now I love roses and chocolates as much as the next person but my soul really wants to honour what Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about.  Simply Love.

One of my all time favourite books is a ‘little’ book called “Love is Letting Go of Fear” by Gerald Jampolsky.  Now when I say ‘little’ I mean it’s truly skinny in size but huge in ideas.  When I first discovered this tiny gem decades ago, I didn’t get it.  I wasn’t ready to get it.  So I dismissed it as self-help rubbish!  (I humbly apologise for my youthful ignorance.)

Years later, mysteriously, this little book flew off the shelf.  I swear it flew off the bookcase with angel’s wings, landing in my unexpecting hands.  Blessedly, this time I read it and, more importantly, I got it.  (Which is why you should never ever get rid of a book!)

Here is the premise of the book in a nutshell, preferably a hazlenut praline!

You can’t love, be real, or be free when you live in fear.

Why?

Love and fear are mutually exclusive.

You can’t live in fear and love life.  You can’t live fearfully and love yourself.  Fear makes us feel vulnerable and visible, so we hold ourselves back from loving.

  • When I fear failure, I can’t love the breathlessness of trying something for the first time.
  • If I fear success, I can’t love the exhilaration of accomplishment.
  • When I fear being visible, it is impossible to love the boldness of my creativity.
  • When I fear not being understood, I cannot love openly and honestly.

I know this is resonating with you…

  • When I let go of my fear I love my child enough to let them grow and go.
  • When I let go of fear I watch with love as my partner pursues their dreams.
  • When I stop fearing loss, I can love with abandon.

Love is quiet, love is gentle, love is big and love is bold…love is all there is (Lennon & McCartney were a true love of this sixties girl!).  Love means letting go of fear because fear is inconsequential in the face of pure love.

BE Love.

Join us in the spirit of Valentine’s Day and embrace Love.  Each day for the next week let love show its power through your words and actions.  Find a way, small or big, to be love.  Face the fear that stops you from experiencing and expressing the ‘you that is Love’.

Love means letting go of fear.  Go ahead, be bold, be love.

With love’s power us HSPs can change the world.

Until Next Time…Defy Ordinary!

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